Fifty Shades of Grey Review

Fifty Shades of Grey is the long anticipated movie adaptation of a novel which originated as Twilight fan fiction...................dear god.

If you are reading this hoping for a scathing review of the film you are in the right place. Now I am aware I am not the target audience for this film or the books it is based on but that doesn't excuse the fact that this is one of the largest atrocities I have ever seen in my life.

The main selling point of the movie is putting it simply is sex and in particular Mr Grey's odd behaviours in the bedroom. This is the films first flaw as these scenes are timid. There is no sexual chemistry between the two leads so these scenes are actually quite hilarious rather than sexy. They somehow manage to have less chemistry than Edward and Bella the very characters they are based on. The story is blatantly based on Twilight there is even a ridiculous love triangle with a character who is near enough identical to Jacob from Twilight although he doesn't transform into a werewolf which would have at least made the story interesting. 

The films only saving grace is that it is well directed. It looks very nice but it is fairly pointless when the contents are total garbage. It's like having to lovely fresh baked slices of bread filled with out of date fish. Just disgusting.

1/10